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Dwight K. Schrute
DWIGHT K. SCHRUTE
Rank: Tom Ivan Awesomeoff
Nominated by Ivan Awesomeoff
2nd Place January 09

Here is a small list to refresh your memory why Dwight is Awesome:

  • faster than 90% of all snakes
  • can escape from a straight jacket
  • purple belt in Goju-Ryu karate
  • plays the recorder
  • creator of Schrute bucks
  • hunted warewolves
  • trained in the art of survelliance
  • consideres himself a survivalist
  • can tell if you are lying
  • skilled at table tennis
  • prays to thor


"I am fast. To give you a reference point I am somewhere between a snake and a mongoose?and a panther."

"How would I describe myself? Three words: hard working, alpha male, jackhammer?merciless?insatiable?"

"I don't have a lot of experience with vampires, but I have hunted werewolves.  I shot one once, but by the time I got to it, it had turned back into my neighbor's dog."

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Dwight K. Schrute was voted MORE AWESOME than:

The Couch Dress


High Fives


General Lee 01


Crop Circles


BigDog Robot


Gurdjieff


Great Wall of China


My Shreddies


Wife Carrying


The Moonwalk


Daito Manabe's Electic Stimulus


Brewing Monks


Godzilla


Bumper Stickers


Fanny Packs


Igloos


Mister Rogers doing The Wave


President Obama


Song for Sarah


Skyrest Pillow


Erwin Wurm's "Fat House"


Pee Wee Herman's Bicycle


Buzkashi


Benny Lava


The Hamburger Bed


Bob Ross


Beer Maids


Chuck Norris vs. Bruce Lee


Gene Wilder's Willy Wonka


Dwight K. Schrute was voted LESS AWESOME than:

Chewbacca


Jesus Christ


Little Superstar


Venus Fly Traps


Theo Jansen's Art


Nikola Tesla


Mock Apple Pie


El Chupacabra


Robocop on a Unicorn


Roller Derby


Black Holes


Your Grammie


President Obama


Wingsuit Base Jumping


Aurora Borealis


Badass Mountain Men


Zombies


Paul Bunyan


Space Invader Invasion


Brawndo: The Thirst Mutilator


The Brick Testament


Captain James T. Kirk


The Man with No Name


Banksy


Teddy Roosevelt


Library of Congress


James Earl Jones Counts to 10


Death Star


Hunter S. Thompson


MST3K


Extent of the Universe


Mark Twain


Jesus Riding A Dinosaur


Walking on the Moon


Les Claypool

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Roller Derby
ROLLER DERBY
Rank: Colonel Ivana B. Awesome
Nominated by Ivana B. Awesome
December 2008 Champion

This has to be the most unique sport ever! I can't quite put my finger on it... roller skating, quarky fashion, maybe bowling league, www wrestling?...

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Roller Derby was voted MORE AWESOME than:

BigDog Robot


Robocop on a Unicorn


Chewbacca


The Couch Dress


Moustache Balaclava


Giant Nintendo Controller


Little Superstar


Meat Suitcase


Flux Capacitor


Fonzie Jumps The Shark


Chuck Norris Action Jeans


BeatBox Didgeridoo


General Lee 01


Caffeinated Soap


Bubb Rubb - Whistle Fan


Crop Circles


Porter Wagoner


Little Sidekicks


Navel Fluff Collection


Bacon Tuxedo


BigDog Robot


Keg Stands


Christmas Sweaters


Transformer Costumes


Red Lipped Batfish


Magic 8 Ball


Freerunning


Dwight K. Schrute


Miracle On Ice


The Hamburger Bed


Flying Spaghetti Monster


Badass Mountain Men


Zombies


Paul Bunyan


Space Invader Invasion


James Earl Jones Counts to 10


Gene Wilder's Willy Wonka


MST3K


Les Claypool


Roller Derby was voted LESS AWESOME than:

Chewbacca


Sasquatch


Nikola Tesla


Robocop on a Unicorn


Cheese Rolling


Mentos and Diet Coke


Narwhals


President Obama


Wingsuit Base Jumping


Aurora Borealis


Beer Maids


Hedgehogs


WAKE n' BACON


Rollerman


Sir Ernest Henry Shackleton


Captain James T. Kirk


Banksy


Johnny Cash


Teddy Roosevelt


Library of Congress


Death Star


Literal Video Versions


Chuck Norris vs. Bruce Lee


Hunter S. Thompson


Extent of the Universe


Mark Twain


Jesus Riding A Dinosaur


Walking on the Moon

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Rank: Colonel DorkPower
DorkPower commented ( about Dwight K. Schrute ) on 10/9/2009
4000th vote goes to Dwight. reply

Rank: Tom Ivan Awesomeoff
Ivan Awesomeoff replied to DorkPower on 10/12/2009
I'm in awe DorkPower. You now have found time to vote 700 times more than me. I'll probably be a major for the next two months. I think its time you pony up and buy this site :-) reply

Rank: Colonel DorkPower
DorkPower replied to Ivan Awesomeoff on 10/13/2009
Thanks Ivan. If I was a guy with money to burn, I would. But really, I don't want to be the owner of this dance club, just the guy who owns the floor with his awesome moves. reply

Rank: Blade the_mad_nader
the_mad_nader commented ( about Roller Derby ) on 9/25/2009
Having been a fan and follower of this sport since 2004, I can say without any reservation that it is the most exciting, hard hitting, and awesome sport to watch. It's got something for just about everyone: amazing action, speed, hitting, strategy, beautiful women of all shapes and sizes, and it's totally DIY - almost universally skater owned and operated! Roller derby is the sporting incarnation of awesome itself! reply

Licks commented ( about Roller Derby ) on 9/2/2009
hell yes!! roller derby is life! reply

Rank: Tom Ivan Awesomeoff
Ivan Awesomeoff commented ( about Dwight K. Schrute ) on 1/19/2009
I can't believe Grammie spanked Dwight.. I wonder if it was fair fight? reply

Rank: Colonel The Dude
The Dude replied to Ivan Awesomeoff on 1/19/2009
Clearly Dwight couldn't get to any of his many weapons that are hidden around the office. reply

Rank: Tom Olav Rokne
Olav Rokne commented ( about Dwight K. Schrute ) on 1/16/2009
The case against Dwight:

1) This is a mainstream, currently popular pop-cultural reference that supports the product of a massive media conglomerate.

2) He's a rip-off of a more amusing character on the better British version of a TV show.

3) You laugh at Dwight because Rainn Wilson is trying to be funny. As opposed to, say, Benny Lava, who is awesome because he isn't trying to be funny.

I rest my case: Dwight K. Schrute is not awesome. reply

Rank: Gomer Jojo the Idiot Circus Boy
Jojo the Idiot Circus Boy replied to Olav Rokne on 1/16/2009
You are mistaken, and will be deducted 5 Schrute Bucks. reply

tyraspanks commented ( about Roller Derby ) on 12/30/2008
Rollerderby is here to stay! reply

Nawty Dee commented ( about Roller Derby ) on 12/27/2008
Roller Derby is the most awesomest of the awesome! I play this wpnderful sport and love everyday of it! reply


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