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    BRAWNDO: THE THIRST MUTILATOR
2nd Place April 09 Brawndo was created for the movie Idiocracy, but the makers of the film didn't let the concept live and die there. They actually make this stuff. You can order it from a number of on-line sites, and the web site and you tube videos that promote it are incredible. Its ironic, in most cases you pay $2.25 for an energy drink, and it pisses you off that you got $.25 of product and paid for $2.00 in marketing. In this case, who cares what's really in the can. I'd pay the premium for the drink, just make SURE the marketing campaign keeps going!
Nominated by Frizzle The Farout
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Filename: brawndo.jpgSource: Still from youtube video Url: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ru6p5NLXxvY&feature=related
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Brawndo: The Thirst Mutilator was voted MORE AWESOME than:
 Chewbacca  The Couch Dress  Shaved Ball Cap  Lamborghinis & Deloreans  Little Superstar  Meat Suitcase  Sasquatch  Venus Fly Traps  Garden Gnomes  Theo Jansen's Art  General Lee 01  Crop Circles  El Chupacabra  BigDog Robot  Dwight K. Schrute  Mister Rogers doing The Wave  President Obama  Wingsuit Base Jumping  Bob Ross  Polio Vaccine  WAKE n' BACON  Zombies  Don Hertzfeldt's Shorts  Ski Jump Toilet  Rollerman Rollerman  Where the Hell is Matt?  Ninja Hauler Listing  UFOs  Double-Necked Guitars  Extreme Shepherding  Smoking Smarties  Cossacks  Paul Bunyan Paul Bunyan  Super Broker Shuffle  Easter Eggs  The Leia Wig  Nessie  Hammerhead Sharks  Space Invader Invasion  Max Raabe  This Super Stars MusiCard  The Brick Testament  Johnny Cash  Library of Congress  Hunter S. Thompson  Mark Twain  Walking on the Moon Brawndo: The Thirst Mutilator was voted LESS AWESOME than:  Nikola Tesla  The Hamburger Bed  Flying Spaghetti Monster  Badass Mountain Men  Hedgehogs Rollerman Space Invader Invasion  Throwing Shoes at George Bush  Captain James T. Kirk  Banksy  Teddy Roosevelt  MST3K  Extent of the Universe  Emperor Norton  Jesus Riding A Dinosaur Walking on the Moon  Les Claypool
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  ROLLERMAN
April 2009 Champion Part Extreme Sport Enthusiast, Part Transformer, Part Super Hero.
Nominated by HGxPerry
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Rollerman was voted MORE AWESOME than:
 Monster Trucks  Moustache Balaclava  Giant Nintendo Controller  Japanese Game Shows  Jesus Christ Lamborghinis & Deloreans Little Superstar Meat Suitcase Sasquatch Garden Gnomes  Mock Apple Pie BigDog Robot  Roller Derby  Miracle On Ice The Hamburger Bed Bob Ross  Beer Maids Hedgehogs Zombies Don Hertzfeldt's Shorts  Luchadores Extreme Shepherding Where the Hell is Matt? UFOs Extreme Shepherding Smoking Smarties  Master of the Internet Cossacks Paul Bunyan Paul Bunyan Super Broker Shuffle Easter Eggs Nessie Hammerhead Sharks Space Invader Invasion Space Invader Invasion Max Raabe Throwing Shoes at George Bush Brawndo: The Thirst Mutilator The Brick Testament Johnny Cash  James Earl Jones Counts to 10  Literal Video Versions Les Claypool Rollerman was voted LESS AWESOME than: Chewbacca Venus Fly Traps Theo Jansen's Art Nikola Tesla Crop Circles President Obama Wingsuit Base Jumping  Aurora Borealis Flying Spaghetti Monster Polio Vaccine  Rabbit Holes Space Invader Invasion Brawndo: The Thirst Mutilator Brawndo: The Thirst Mutilator Captain James T. Kirk  The Man with No Name Banksy Library of Congress Mark Twain Emperor Norton Jesus Riding A Dinosaur Walking on the Moon
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Never bring an Ice Cream truck to a Taser fight.
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i would love to Become more popular with law enforcement
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I've been somewhat popular with law enforcement in the past; while interesting and even hilariously amusing at times, overall I'd have to say it was so not awesome.
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TO A'NY OF YOU ABOUT TO VOTE' FOR THAT FRENCH ROBOT DUDe
DON'T' CHECK OUT THE TWO OTHER COMMERCIALS FOR BRAWNDO ON YOU TUBE. Please. reply
Whichever one of these wins should win it all.
But I have to say I prefer Brawndo. Because it's more than just an energy drink with an awesome ad; it's what Brawndo represents. It represents someone seeing a joke in a movie and deciding "Hey! That should actually exist!" It represents an ironic sense of style over substance. It represents an awareness of stupid advertising claims. It represents the phrase "It has Electrolytes!" being a selling point when the consumer doesn't know what that means. It represents freedom. It represents America. reply
In fact, I will go so far as to say that to vote against Brawndo is anti-American.
If you vote for Rollerman, you are voting for the French. So go ahead froggy, vote against Brawndo, but if you hate the USA that much, why don't you go and marry Osama. That's right, if you vote for Rollerman, you are supporting the terrorists. The terrorists who hate refreshment and would rather see you thirsty than drinking BRAWNDO! reply
On the other hand, Rollerman has a suit that allows him to roll on his stomach or back at highway speeds. Brawndo can only simulate that feeling.
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Do you know what Rollerman doesn't offer? The feeling of being AMERICAN!
Brawndo is the American flag *in a can*!
Rollerman ... he's still FRENCH!
Do you know what the antithesis of awesome is? It's being French.
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Bad news Olav.. It's looking like an all French finals. Maybe you took the wrong tactic with the pro-american ploy. This is the same crowd that gave 'throwing shoes at George Bush' a 14-7 record!
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You can still be pro-American and anti-Bush. In fact, I might even go so far as to say that you HAVE to be anti-Bush to truly be pro-American. But that's a discussion for another website.
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So true... and I would argue as well, you don't even have to hate Bush to think that whole scene with the flying shoes was awesome. You could even think Bush's shoe dodging skills were awesome!
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I do have to give him props, his neo-like dodging skills give hope to all of us non-ninjas.
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dang... Heck Yes Olav +++rep
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vote for Brawndo or Paul Bunyan, we need some upsets....
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right away sir.
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lol, after saying that I just realized who you are!
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Why do we need upsets? Sounds like a lame way to go. Vote for what is most awesome.. period!
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Ah yes, its the battle or Brawndo vs. Blondeau.
In my opinion, actually flying down the street is a whole lot more awesome that feeling like it. Plus, using Daft Punk as background music is just that much better.
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I VOTED FOR BR'AWNDO WITH MY FISTS'S! BECAU'SE I WANT TO BECOME' POP'ULAR!
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Rollerman's awesomeness stems at least partially from the fact that it is apparently unintended. He just does his thing, and that's pretty freakin' awesome!
Brawndo, on the other hand, seems to be a corporate-packaged, you will think this is awesome because focus groups have told us it incorporates all the elements you already think are awesome. Sure, there is still some Awesome in Brawndo...but it's less awesomeness than the sum of it's parts.
Rollerman gets the nod!
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I don't know about that. He's marketing the suit, which makes him corporate. So, now you have to ask which awesome is more awesome. The mass-marketed over the top awesome, or the subtle, rolling awesome.
Both awesomes are fairly awesome. Hence, my quandary with this matchup. I've changed my mind five times already.
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If this is a question of commercialism, Brawndo is clearly more commercial than Rollerman. I've never seen one of those on Dick's Sporting Goods mannequin
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I'm ok with the commericialism. Brawndo is a commercial for a real product, but I think it was originally more about getting people to see a movie. I think it was just such an awesome marketing campaign they kept it going. I like Branwndo simply because of the balls it took to make it happen. But you start talking about balls... there is another youtube video where Rollerman passes a motorcycle while headed down a winding mountain road.. holy roller balls...
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I think Rollerman just taking something he's passionate about and going with it. Brawndo is just another energy drink with a cool ad and a lame movie appearance.
Then again, I have a bias towards Rollerman so I'd vote for him regardless of the opponent =P
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That's my point exactly! It's not so much the commercialism itself, it's that commercialism was the genesis for the IDEA of Brawndo. Even if Rollerman did market his roller suit, that just followed his crazy passion for extreme sport/stunts
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from what i understand Brawndo was just a joke for a movie.. but then people were like wow this is hilarious and started to manufacture these drinks.. Thats Pretty Dang AweSome imo
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This one is agonizing for me. I think the final decision has to come down to which would I rather do, roll down the street in a badass suit with wheels all over it, or drive an ice cream truck full of ANGRY BEES through a petting zoo.... Damn, I think I just made things worse.
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Brawndo: its like doing luge in traffic!
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But Rollerman really IS doing luge in traffic!!!
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Exactly my point! Rollerman is really doing something that sounds like the kind of thing Brawndo would talk about to sell energy drinks.
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He reminds me of the Wheelers from "Return to Oz."
"She's got a CHICKEN!!!!!"
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I find it interesting that the only thing Rollerman has gone down to so far is Rabbit Holes, which is 6-8 so far for the month.
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Have you ever hit a rabbit hole while you were rollerblading? It hurts!
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You make an excellent point.
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monster trucks can go over rabbit holes fine (and crush a couple lamborghinis and deloreas on the way)
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Anything you make in school that turns you into a Daft Punk video prop is awesome.
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LMAO "make words your bitch" thats great
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I just watched this again, at the end, really quickly it says "Because you can't drink a car battery"
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Dude I think that Brwando: The Thirst Mutilator is going to take it all this month.
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It has what plants crave: Awesomeness.
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At first I thought it said "make words *you* bitch" which was also really funny.
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