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Mitch Hedberg
MITCH HEDBERG
Rank: A Very Model of a Modern Major General Ghazi
Nominated by Ghazi

The comedy world lost a true genius in 2005 when Mitch Hedberg was yet another victim of drug overdose. His comedy was brilliant in its simplicity--it spoke of a worldview that took nothing seriously, and nothing at face value. He only spent about six years in the national spotlight, but it was enough to build a tremendous following.

A few quick quotes:

  • I bought a seven-dollar pen because I always lose pens and I got sick of not caring.
  • I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.
  • Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier'n helpin' 'em move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load shit into a truck.
  • On a traffic light green means 'go' and yellow means 'yield', but on a banana it's just the opposite. Green means 'hold on,' yellow means 'go ahead,' and red means, 'where the fuck did you get that banana at?'
  • I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.
  • You know, I'm sick of following my dreams, man. I'm just going to ask where they're going and hook up with 'em later.
  • I have a vest. If I had my arms cut off, it would be a jacket.
  • Yeah, this comedy is all a part of my Get Rich Slow scheme... and its working.
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Mitch Hedberg was voted MORE AWESOME than:

Epic Meal Time


Rick Estrin and the Nightcats


Ümläüts!


Dancing Chicken Man


Mitch Hedberg was voted LESS AWESOME than:

Babe Ruth


The Greatest Letter Ever Printed On An NFL Team Letterhead


Apollo 13


Special Olympics


Ruth Stout


Spaceman Spiff


The Tick


Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter


The Hong Kong Cavaliers


Jeremy Bentham


Microscopic Photography


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Apollo 13
APOLLO 13
Rank: Jimmy Trane
Nominated by Trane

Apollo 13 was the third Apollo mission intended to land on the Moon. The craft was successfully launched toward the Moon, but the landing had to be aborted after an oxygen tank ruptured, severely damaging the spacecraft's electrical system. The flight was commanded by James A. Lovell with John L. "Jack" Swigert as Command Module pilot and Fred W. Haise as Lunar Module pilot. Swigert was a late replacement for the original CM pilot Ken Mattingly, who was grounded by the flight surgeon after exposure to German measles. The mission was launched on April 11, 1970 at 13:13 CST. Two days later an explosion crippled the service module upon which the Command Module depended. To conserve its batteries and the oxygen needed for the last hours of flight, the crew instead used the Lunar Module's resources as a "lifeboat" during the return trip to Earth. Despite great hardship caused by limited power, loss of cabin heat, shortage of potable water and the critical need to jury-rig the carbon dioxide removal system, the crew returned safely to Earth on April 17. NASA called the mission a "successful failure". (Wikipedia)

 This was a true story of survival that left the entire country in heated suspense to see whether or not the three astronauts would make it back safely or not. The fact that they were resourceful enough to survive in space in such conditions and land successfully makes this one of the most awesome stories in history.

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Apollo 13 was voted MORE AWESOME than:

The Greatest Letter Ever Printed On An NFL Team Letterhead


Channel 4 News Team- From Anchorman


Special Olympics


Indian Thriller


Microscopic Photography


Snakes on a Plane


Ruth Stout


Mitch Hedberg


Knute Rockne


Indian Thriller


The Tick


Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter


The Hong Kong Cavaliers


The Old Negro Space Program


Jeremy Bentham


Man makes own Iron Man Suit


Rick Estrin and the Nightcats


Ümläüts!


Word Lens


The Kenora Thistles


Apollo 13 was voted LESS AWESOME than:

Babe Ruth

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Rank: George The Dude
The Dude commented ( about Apollo 13 ) on 7/11/2011
Apollo 13 is not the story of the Astronauts. Apollo 13's Awesome is found in the story of the teamwork that had to take place on Earth to return those brave men home. The very real possibility existed that those men may have died in space, and that their bodies would have ended up in orbit forever. A gruesome reminder of the dangers of space travel. But NO! Engineers on Earth came together without sleeping for days, developing techniques that previously did not exist to bring men back from the brink of death from as far away as humans have ever dared to go. Apollo 13 is AWESOME!!! reply high five2

Rank: George The Dude
The Dude commented ( about this matchup ) on 7/11/2011
Am I the only one who just doesn't find anything Awesome about Mitch Hedburg? Between Stanhope and Hedburg, this place is turning into Comedianoff. reply high five

Rank: A Very Model of a Modern Major General Ghazi
Ghazi replied to The Dude on 7/11/2011
and I was thinking of nominating Katt Williams...=\ reply high five

Rank: Jimmy Olav Rokne
Olav Rokne replied to on 7/11/2011
That's a bit unfair. More U.S. presidents have been nominated than comedians... you never complained that it turned into a presidentoff. More scientists have been nominated and it's not a scientistoff. They weren't even in the same month. reply high five

Rank: George The Dude
The Dude replied to Olav Rokne on 7/11/2011
Reason: even my very favorite comedians aren't Awesome. Bill Hicks? hilarious. Killed himself with Cigarettes.... not Awesome. Hedberg? Recycled Stephen Wright material. Overdosed on drugs.... not Awesome. Presidents do Awesome things. Scientists discover Awesome things. Comedians make commentary on everyday life (some of it recycled from other comedians observations of everyday life.) As much as I love stand-up comedians, I'm at a loss to name a single Awesome stand-up. reply high five

Rank: A Very Model of a Modern Major General MediocreMarvel
MediocreMarvel replied to The Dude on 7/11/2011
Note to self: Do NOT toss own Stand-Up act up as a nomination... Soul crushing 0 win season will result...
In other news - I'll be at The Whiskey Cafe in Lyndhurst, NJ on 7/12/11 at around 9PM reply high five2

Rank: Jimmy Olav Rokne
Olav Rokne replied to MediocreMarvel on 7/11/2011
If I were in within a six-hour drive, I would totally catch that. Do you have any material on youtube? reply high five2

Rank: A Very Model of a Modern Major General MediocreMarvel
MediocreMarvel replied to Olav Rokne on 7/11/2011
In the age of media that we live in, I tend to not post my stuff. That is until I'm getting paid on the regular. Comics are the worst thieves in the world. reply high five

Rank: Jimmy Olav Rokne
Olav Rokne replied to MediocreMarvel on 7/12/2011
That's fair... Carlos Mencia does exist, and he certainly steals a lot of jokes off youtube videos posted by more talented comedians than him. reply high five

Rank: George The Dude
The Dude replied to on 7/17/2011
And I would DEFINITELY come see you. I LOVE stand up comedy. Spent some time with Adam Ferrara yesterday, and he was a real class act. I just don't see him as particularly Awesome. reply high five

Rank: A Very Model of a Modern Major General Ghazi
Ghazi commented ( about this matchup ) on 7/11/2011
god damnit....voting against my own entry again...! reply high five

Rank: Jimmy Olav Rokne
Olav Rokne commented ( about Apollo 13 ) on 7/10/2011
Walking on the moon = awesome. Apollo 13 did not equal walking on the moon. Ergo, I vote for Anchorman. reply high five2


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